thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
