Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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