today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
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