there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize