Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
it was like eating out sand paper
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
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