That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Randomize
