Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Randomize