what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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