Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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