I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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