I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
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