$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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