Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Randomize
