I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
this beer tastes like vomit already
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
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im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
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my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
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