Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
