covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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