Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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