love makes seman taste better
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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