I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
