Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
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I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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