watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Randomize