pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
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