for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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