you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
