i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize