she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Randomize
