Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize