Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
foreskin is a definite game changer
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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