your parents love me but you hate me
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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