I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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