worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize