hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
They have beer where we have blood.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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