so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
