Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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