I bet he comes in French.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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