Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
