Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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