i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
