Texts From Last Night

Texts from October, 2011

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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.

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  (609): it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating. http://tfl.nu/22js
  Replies (4) Good night (1449) Bad night (964) Order T-Shirt
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall

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  (302): My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall http://tfl.nu/j51z
  Replies (13) Good night (1134) Bad night (556) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills

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  (704): I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills http://tfl.nu/vb73
  Replies (10) Good night (1815) Bad night (517) Order T-Shirt
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  (858): View more from California

  No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.

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  (858): No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter. http://tfl.nu/lm85
  Replies (17) Good night (3096) Bad night (786) Order T-Shirt
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.

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  (210): Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors. http://tfl.nu/4w9v
  Replies (20) Good night (3518) Bad night (1795) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.

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  (845): officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand. http://tfl.nu/8nd1
  Replies (7) Good night (1390) Bad night (756)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.

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  (970): Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line. http://tfl.nu/60ef
  Replies (5) Good night (1470) Bad night (468) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  Parents weekend was a success.

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.

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  (804): Parents weekend was a success. (973): Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success... (804): Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend. http://tfl.nu/9gkg
  Replies (4) Good night (1588) Bad night (540)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"

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  (870): he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs" http://tfl.nu/uf2c
  Replies (8) Good night (2445) Bad night (655) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.

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  (519): I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT. http://tfl.nu/zwn2
  Replies (3) Good night (2545) Bad night (499) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place

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  (818): Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place http://tfl.nu/xlhx
  Replies (58) Good night (15807) Bad night (824)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.

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  (307): Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory. http://tfl.nu/grsq
  Replies (5) Good night (1434) Bad night (612) Order T-Shirt
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.

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  (774): Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep. http://tfl.nu/pcyk
  Replies (11) Good night (1554) Bad night (755) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball

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  (412): just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball http://tfl.nu/dojj
  Replies (9) Good night (734) Bad night (1325) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.

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  (405): I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you. http://tfl.nu/on2x
  Replies (4) Good night (1223) Bad night (770) Order T-Shirt