I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
