haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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