I'm eating all of the evidence.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
