I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I cannot find my penis.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
