In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize