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I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
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