you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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