Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I think I sprained my soul last night
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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