shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
