kristin has been a bad kristin
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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