i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Blood and glitter go together right?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.