any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
